Most introverts are very kind souls. While all people kick themselves mentally now and then, introverts are particularly prone to negative self-talk. And most of this trash talk is both false and harmful. To be happy and healthy, you need to get your negative voices under control. Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, and author J. Rowling have more in common than being highly successful. Identifying shyness. Understanding sensitivity. Shy, sensitive, and introverted all mean very different things, but in many cases, they overlap.
For example, you may have many traits of an introvert, some traits of a shy person, and a few traits of a sensitive person. The tips I offer in this book for succeeding as an introvert can also be helpful for people who are shy or sensitive.
To help you find out which of these terms describes you best, this chapter takes a look at each one. After that, I discuss the two kissing cousins of introversion: shyness and sensitivity. And I also talk a little about the difference between normal, healthy introversion or shyness and problems such as social anxiety disorder, avoidant personality disorder, and agoraphobia.
In Chapter 1, I talk about what introversion is. Here, I look at the introvert-extrovert spectrum and give you a chance to test yourself and see just how introverted you really are. Well, hermits come pretty darned close, but not many of them exist.
In reality, everyone falls somewhere on a continuum between extroversion and introversion, with the ambiverts I talk about in Chapter 1 landing somewhere in the middle. For example, my friend Jeff is a very private guy who hates parties and loves to read for hours.
But he dresses like a total outie, in bright colors and bold styles, and I can spot him instantly in a crowded restaurant. Instead, realize that every innie has a little bit of extrovert inside, and every outie has a little bit of introvert inside.
There are a lot of shades of gray when it comes to introversion and extroversion. You may even run across one of these tests at work because a lot of companies use them. I like to think things through first and come up with a solid plan, even if it creates delays. I usually talk to other people about my problems, and I may start taking action before I have a full plan in mind. How would you react if you found out that your company was paying to send you to a two-day team-building exercise?
As you probably guessed, introverts typically answer A to these questions, and extroverts answer B. What activities did you enjoy most as a 5-year-old? As a year-old? As a teenager? If you had the time and money to do anything you wanted to do, what would your favorite activities be? What were your parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles interested in as adults especially those who retired and could do what they pleased?
If you have siblings, what are they interested in? Most introverts show their colors early in childhood by preferring innie hobbies, such as reading or art. When asked the question, What would you do if you were rich and could do anything? Most people can trace their innie or outie genes back at least a few generations by identifying what their relatives liked to do best. For instance, my introverted friend Sarah says that when her dad retired, he spent a year trying to read Norse mythology in the original language.
But there are two more traits to consider if you want to truly know yourself: shyness and sensitivity. I talk about shyness in the next section and sensitivity later in this chapter.
In fact, as you see in this section, a lot of extroverts are shy, and a lot of introverts. Upload Sign In Join. Create a List. Download to App.
Length: pages 6 hours. Looks like you are currently in Finland but have requested a page in the United States site. Would you like to change to the United States site? Joan Pastor. So sometimes that grated too. That said, I still think the book is valuable for newbie introverts and the extroverts or ambiverts who want to understand them.
Just don't take everything in it as gospel; and realise that if you don't match something in there exactly, it doesn't mean you're not a "real introvert".
As an innie, I had previously read Susan Cain's book also. I prefer this book as it is a more balanced point of view that sometimes innies should have a few outie tricks up their sleeves and gives some coping tips.
As an innies we have very little tolls for coping in this outside world and the introvert extrovert thing is really applicable in how I interact with people and take in information so it is really important to me to get some coping skills as I am an extreme introvert unfortunately. This book had some interesting points about how introverts behave and interact with the world. It also had some good advice on how to function in an extroverted world if you are extremely introverted.
Advice on jobs, but also for family and friends, and relationships between innies and outies. OK - most of this stuff I've read but no bad thing to go back to. There are no discussion topics on this book yet. Readers also enjoyed. Without these cookies, we can't provide services to you. These cookies allow us to monitor OverDrive's performance and reliability. They alert us when OverDrive services are not working as expected. Without these cookies, we won't know if you have any performance-related issues that we may be able to address.